So here's to silence, that cuts me to the core

I think I need to get back to blogging.

I'm becoming this recluse that just needs to get out more.

No, I'm not studying very hard. No, I'm not hardcore applying for jobs.

And no, I'm not partying. At all.

So what HAVE I been doing?

Feels like Im caught in the middle

I miss Kingston so much. I miss my independence so much. I miss being able to go anywhere at whatever time I want. I miss taking care of myself. I miss feeling like I have my whole life in my own hands. I miss people at work.

But actually... I don't really know what I want right now. BOGGLED

Holy cow.

It's been a full month since I last posted. I have really become a lazy bitch.

To be fair, nothing's been going on. Well... not nothing, exactly. But nothing I care to speak of anymore.

I am also one sad motherfucker. One really sad motherfucker, I tell you.

You'll be my Chris and I'll be your Gwyneth

I love Lady Gaga's covers, especially when she changes the lyrics to the songs (which is all the time), she makes them so funny.

Got so much work coming up, and a test this Thursday. So fucking lazy haha.

I haven't yet gotten my results for the assignments I handed up in January, I get so nervous when I think about it. I thought I did alright whilst I was writing them.... but when I reread them, I realised that my English was horrid! Well, what do you expect from something that was written in the wee hours of the morning with not much sleep or rest prior?

AAHHHHHH I hope everything turns out alright.... =/

And I've run out of cooking ideas. I'm so clueless about what groceries to buy every week now because I've no idea what I want to make! Because of that I've been buying salmon and cous cous and rocket salad for the past three weeks. Not that I'm complaining... it's a healthy and yummy dish, but I need some variety!

I tried baking pork chops, and it didn't turn out so well. They aren't too bad... just not as fantastic as I had hoped they would be.

I've been wanting to make lamb mince lasagne for the past two weeks but by the time I get to Sainsbury's at 7pm on a Saturday evening, the lamb mince are all sold out. =.= BAH ANNOYED.

Work has been tiring. Because one of my coworker's girlfriend had just given birth, I had to take over some of his shifts. Not that I'm complaining really, it's just this stupid company has a (strong) tendency to underpay their workers. They forgot to pay me for the hours I worked in December! I was so cheesed when I saw my paycheck =.=

It's around another 4 months til I step foot on Malaysian soil again, and I'm missing Aiman and my parents more and more. Yes, I'm saying 'parents' now and not just mum. As annoying as Daddy is... I think I quite miss him as well. I always feel like sending him a text or something... but don't, because I think it'll be weird. Haha. I know... stupid, right. But I will send him a text... soon.

I kind of don't miss the food anymore. It's like... when you miss someone/something so much it hurts so bad (yes, missing food hurts me) you kind of become numb after awhile.

And I should take better care of my Purpleberry. It looks like I've had it for years now... full of scratches and constantly hanging on me...

Have to stop dropping it and throwing it around haha... then again, I always say that.

Miss having a flip phone... unfortunately I don't like the keypad on the Pearl Flip.

Dear Blackberry company,

Please design a nice Blackberry flip/clamshell phone by April 2011, please.

Yours sincerely,

Hwee Ching Lim

(One of those customers' whose life cannot function properly without the existence of her purpleberry)

Right enough crap in one post... good night.

Oh and baby, you'll be my Chris and I'll be your Gwyneth (a fatter version :p), owhkay?

I can hear my lover call, "Come to me"

I'm lying in bed wide awake.

The song "River of No Return" by Marilyn Monroe is playing over and over in my head.

When I close my eyes and try to sleepp, I feel even more awake.

"Oh, there's a river, called The River of No Return... Gone, gone, forever... To be lost in the stormy sea."

There was this CNY thing in the market place outside where I work today. They were playing CNY songs (the irritating kind) and old chinese songs; like the Wong Fei Hong theme song (which reminded me of daddy) and Teresa Teng's 'The Moon Represents My Heart' (which reminded me of mum) and they also had lion dances (which reminded me of my grandma - I felt tears prickling.

Funny how you never know that the last time is the last.

"You'll never return to me..."

Is you big enough?

I got this song stuck in my head and I can't stop listening to it.

I'm not a big fan of Rihanna, as many of you well know... But this one is really addictive. Try it out if you haven't already: Rihanna - Rude Boy.

The temperature here in London has been increasing, telling me that Spring is on its way... I have already experienced 2 seasons here and am about to experience the next one. Can't wait to not have to wear a coat when I go out!

I've been eating in massive amounts... I had 4 pots of yoghurt, 3 eggs, a garlic baguette, salmon cous cous salad, 4 pieces of fried chicken with a side of wedges... oh, and a lot of elderflower juice. But no worries, I will lose the weight as summer comes along. Because my money would have run out (from too much shopping) by then. HA! Just nice.

K Im here typing out crap again because I am shit bored and you know your life sucks when the only things you look forward to are classes and work. Actually looking forward to work isn't such a loser thing because when you work you're earning so it kind of is something to look forward to unless you're one of those people who's obsessed with money then you'd just be a loser yes I am digressing...

Right so I spent the whole day eating and watching Cougar Town. How wonderfully unproductive. I really cherish and appreciate days like these because I'm pretty sure I won't be having many days like this in the future.

Which brings me to my next topic. Last night I was bored (haha when am I NEVER bored???) and decided to research a little on summer internships; check out requirements, how to apply, application processes... etc. And then I realised (yes, yet another realisation) that I don't fucking know what I want to do! I know I know, everyone my age is more or less in the same position. But seriously, how does one go about picking a department to intern in when one has no bloody idea what s/he wants to do as a career?

I think it'd be cool and interesting to be an economics journalist, but I think I would end up hating the job. Then I thought since I'm so into trivial things like celeb gossip and clothes and stuff, maybe I should become a journalist in that area. Then again, there are SO many other people aspiring to be one of those and the industry is really quite hard to break in to - but that's just it, what ISN'T hard?

Which brings me to the question: what in the world do I want to do????

I know adults who already have a career path will tell you "Don't worry too much... you'll figure it out as time goes by."

But you see, I need to decide NOW. I want to start working towards something NOW, I need to know NOW!

I really need to see a career counselor.


On that note, I shall end this post abruptly. Goodnight world.

I'm gona love you anyway

I am updating for the sake of updating.

Can't wait for classes to start. I am SO fucking bored. My social life is close to zero, not that I'm complaining actually... I am starting to turn into my father - I can't stand most people around me, and my ego is bigger than the sky... sometimes I think I deserve to be alone. Haha.

Not to mention free time = $$$$.

When the sun comes up (if you've lived in London, you'd have noticed that the sun doesn't come up often) I decide to go to the town center for a walk, soak in some sunshine. Then I happen on TopShop, H&M, River Island, Warehouse, Jane Norman... you get the idea.

And John Lewis. Ah... I go in there just for the home section. Pots, pans, plates, cutlery.... I want to buy them all. But I'll start with a large casserole pot haha. Need something proper to make my lamb stew.

I was just counting the months I've been here and it has only been 4 months. I just finished my first semester of university. Everything seems to have passed by in a flash. This has officially been the longest since I have not slept in my bed in Mutiara Damansara. But when I think of Aiman... the past 4 months suddenly feel like an eternity has passed. I haven't smelled him, held his hand, hugged him, kissed him, played with his curly hair or buttoned his shirt for him in 4 months. 4 very long months.

Oleksandra (my Ukrainian/Czech friend) and I went museum hopping just two days ago, and it so great. I LOVE classical art. Tate Britain and the National History Museum was THE best. I definitely have to go back to Tate Britain again...

And I got more hours at work this week so YAY FOR ME! It's about time that moolah started coming in (from my mommy doesn't count) aahhhh....

Right here's a picture of me in front of Tate Britain:







Feeling so bloody restless...

So let me tell you again and again and again

Right so my 20th birthday came and went. I am not no longer a teenager, and for those of you who have me on msn will know that I have changed my nickname.

No more b l i n d e d b y t h e l i g h t * f o x y | HAHAHAH

But my msn email is still sweet n sexy GAHAHHAHA so um yeah will change that in due time. I still feel like a child. Perhaps next year... when I really enter adulthood.

I spent the last week with Jade.... the days passed by so quickly. Time in general has been passing quickly. I know I've been saying that over and over in each post... but it has!

Assignment update: I have managed to complete 2 and a half essays and an online assessment and a short 10 question workbook. Heh. Not much I know... only 5 and a half more essays to go! Everything is due on Wednesday and Thursday, so I need to give it my best til then.

I WILL FINISH ALL THOSE ESSAYS AND HAND THEM UP ON TIME! I SWEAR ON MY... new camera. Yes. I swear on my new camera that they will be done and handed up by the stipulated time.

And Grace came back three days ago I now have my boil porridge person (po tim wa chuk) back WEEEEE~

Owhkay I don't even know why I feel so light I still have 5 and a half fucking more essays to write in the short span of 4 days and here I am typing away a post for my blog when I should be typing away for my essays heh okok so er BYE!

I am too goddamned lazy to post up pictures so just go to my facebook if you reaaallyyy wana see my pictures haha haha ha ha ha I make myself sound like Im so famous HAHA!


P.s.: I miss my Babykins.

Why the hell does my hot chocoffee taste SALTY?

Owhkay Grace and Wei Kit are going home this weekend, and coming back on the 7th and 8th. Siang, Jade and Joe are coming down on the 22nd but going traveling on the 23rd and only coming back on the 2nd of Jan. So that's pretty much all the friends I would want to spend Christmas and New Year's with.

And that also leaves me, alone. So I'm going to Reading to stay with my cousins and not be alone :(
Also since Jon is in Portsmouth (and I assume it's near to Reading HAHA) maybe I'll go hang with him a day or two.

Other news; my hair is falling off my head in bunches. No shitz.
It's like the tress in autumn, where the leaves are falling off, particularly when the wind blows. In this case, when I run my fingers through my hair a few strands come off without fail. If this keeps up I'm going to bald.

No shitz.

Then I go on facebook and see all my friends at home; clubbing, hanging out, doing shit- and I feel crappy. I wanna go back to those times where I felt safe... where I felt like I belonged.

But I suppose this is what I am supposed to feel, right? Being out on my own in a different place. Far, far away from all that I know.

But somehow I think that these feelings began some time ago, probably in the middle of form 4.

I had moved to a class where none of my clique was in and I had to sort of make close friends all over again. It was then that I lost some friends, confidence, assertion, determination and some of what used to be my huge self esteem.

Suddenly, I was in the middle.

But of course, I gained a lot as well. I made friends with my classmates (May Yi I still love you x 100) and I saw the different social circles in a whole different way- but still, I felt like I didn't belong. May Yi made everything better those two years, but when I went to college I felt the same way again.

After that I just got used to being on my own. Sitting on my own staring into space without even pretending to be texting or surfing the net on my phone, eating on my own, shopping on my own, swimming on my own- with my thoughts as company.

Even when Leyshani and I became bestfriends, I could not and would rather not hang out with anyone else other than her, May Yi and of course, Aiman.

I've become such a hermit without even noticing it- in my little shell, reluctant to come out for anything.

I miss being sure about myself, about knowing where Im supposed to go and what Im supposed to do.

Bah well enough of this self expository shit I should change my blog layout and I should go for my 9am lecture tomorrow haha I've been skipping it for the past 3 weeks because 9am is just too friggin early.


Oh right, hot chocoffee = Hot chocolate + coffee.





I wonder how is it that I don't look like I'm balding when this much of hair is falling off my head every day.



I'll be cutting my hair this weekend. Adeline once told me that when she felt like she needed to get rid of bad juju, she'd cut her hair. Made her feel liberated, she said. So that's what I'll do. Feel liberated.

No, I won't be cutting my hair.

Grace will.

Imagine all the people, sharing all the way

So my period has been coming frequently and I was really freaked out the morning two days ago when I woke up and found blood on my panties because I thought my period had just come like 2 weeks ago??? But apparently not after properly recalling it has already been 28 days so yes my period is just on time which means TIME IS PASSING SO GODDAMNED FAST but it's good in a way now it's only 6 months and one week until the day I will hold my Aiman again and fall asleep in my mother's lap and annoy and fight with my dad and eat yummy cheap food and watch movies with my Aiman so yay for time passing quickly wooooo!

Today I went to Camden market with Jon and Wei Kit and Jasmine and May Ee and we walked around looking at things I wanted to buy this cute warm woolen beanie but I didn't because it was £10 and I couldn't bear to spend £10 so I didn't buy it and then on the way to dinner I dropped the £10 =.= fuck me laaaa should've just bought the bloody thing AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH dkaldksdlkj;AKD;LEKPOWTLSKVML [;lk;sljpojaelksdl pissed at myself and life and then we were supposed to go to the fair in Hyde Park it's call Winter Wonderland but it fucking started RAINING and I practically walked under the rain to get to places and tube stations mahai EVEN MORE pissed at myself because I decided to wear my coat which didn't have a hood that could shield me a little from the rain and EVEN MORE pissed with life for being so shitty and no one has called me back about the job applications DIU knnccbaswdjklasdjklasdjklasdjkl BAH.




They looked so cute huddled together on the steps




Failed picture. Just shows how long I have not went out and had an outing worthy of picture-taking.




Little boy :)




HA! I still got it in meeeee




Do you see two couples?

Hint: There's one on the bed.




Jon so henskem ^^




For you, Babykins. I miss you.






Right so Im going to go sleep now and pray that life gets better tomorrow.

Money, money, money.

Owhkay I know I keep saying that I need to get a job but I never get around to it.

SO, at the top of my to-do list tomorrow is:

WRITE A CV followed by START DROPPING THEM AT EVERY FREAKING COMPANY I CAN FIND.

Ok. I MUST do these things tomorrow.


Im going to go buy stuff to make lasagna as well hehe. YES, GRACE? :D

And today I was so bored I had decided to walk to Iceland (as in the grocery store, sort of like Tesco, but they have the CHEAPEST packed food ever LOVE IT- I'm starting to pick up Grace's taglines). I decided to walk there because after google-mapping the directions, it seemed fairly simple.

So off I went! Google maps said it'd take 30 minutes; I left at 2.45pm and arrive at 4.15pm.
Well I have no sense of direction (Aiman and Leysha can vouch for this, I've been the cause of much frustration and wasted time and fuel in the past) so I think that was why I took so long haha.

Then after I was done buying my yummy packed frozen food (all for only £1 each!) I walked to the opposite side of the road to walk back, then saw a bus stop. And on the bus route poster I saw the code for the bus that would take me to almost directly in front of my place. Haha. As Wei Kit would put it: Epic fail.

Well, it was not allll time wasted, I found out that the buses did travel in so deep, and I exercised by brisk walking! (I tell myself this so that I won't feel so bloody stupid haha =.=)

Yes so enough of wasting time, I must hit the books now. No, I know it's only been 3 weeks since uni started, 2 weeks since classes started (1st week was induction) but no, I am not being a geek. My micro 1 lecturer (as hot as he is) sent us all an email saying "In-class test on Wednesday morning, please be at (venue) at 11am sharp. Bring along with you a pencil, ruler and a non-programmable calculator."

Right and I was thinking of clubbing on Tuesday night haha!
Hence, why I need to hit the books now.


x

Edit (10.44pm)

I just reread the email my lecturer sent out and it said:


The in class test will take place on Wednesday 11th November. Please come to room JG0003, at 11.00 sharp. You are allowed to bring along a ruler, pencil, eraser and a basic calculator (only models allowed are Casio; FX83 or FX85 variant (with or without suffix).


Wednesday, 11th November.

11th November.



FUCK ME PLS.

I WANT TO EAAAT

I have this sudden urge to go to Lidl and Sainsbury's and Wilkinson's to buy lasagna ingredients (Lidl for the ground beef and tomato chunks in puree and carrots and mushrooms, Sainsbury's for the flour and unsalted butter and ground nutmeg, Wilkinson's for a baking tray =.=) and make lasagna aaahhhh I am THIS close to doing that right now but I've already overspent on grocoeries this week :(

I shall make Bangers and Mash and Lasagna next week! Yes yes I shalllllll omg excited.
Quite bored today, Babykins has went out for Jeremy's birthday so no skypy skypy, Leysha has fallen asleep (I think, she hasn't been replying me or answering skype) and everyone in my flat is out (not that I hung out with them anyway) all that's left to do is... eat. Owhkay fine I still got stuff to study but screw that I'd rather eat and catch up on Gossip Girl.

Should I go get lasagna stuff now? Should I sshooooouulllddd I?
SO TEMPTED OMGOMGOMG aaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Ok I shall make lasagna during the weekend. Now, I will do my laundry. And watch Gossip Girl. And ping Grace. Oh, and finish my reading, of course.



Now which should I do first :(

DON'T SPEAAAKKK I KNOWW JUST WHAT YOU'RE SAYIINGGGG

SO PLEASE STOP EXPLAINING, DON'T TELL ME COS IT HUUURRTTTSSSS NOOO NOOO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Im singing (no, make it trying to sing) to No Doubt's 1997 hit 'Don't Speak' at the top of my lungs because I like to do that when Im alone.

Like the other time when I was at work and I was singing (what song was that again?) at the top of my lungs and aunty Kian Huat came up to see if anything was wrong. Haha!

I just got my wisdom tooth taken out yesterday morning. Aiman kindly drove me to the dentist and waited there for me while I got my WISDOM extracted and then kindly took me to the grocery store to buy some straws (so I could drink stuff) and campbell's soup to drink so I could take my meds.

Then he lovingly let me lie on his lap while he usap-usap-ed my hair (I love it when he does that, calms me down so much... I'd usually fall asleep when he does that, but this time the pain was quite excruciating so his usap-usap-ing merely calmed me down) mmmm and I so love to smell him!

Haha ok I know this is the most PDA post I've written here so far but I can't help it :( I'll be gone for 9 months (or more) and then back for 2 to 3 months and then gone again...

But we'll make it, won't we, Babykins?


Right so I have a treat for you, oh dear Blog! PICTURES!


Ok photobucket is bitchy.
But nvm it's only a few pictures so I'll go one by one!




Aiman getting his curls trimmed




Final Destination is one of the stupidest, money wasting movies, EVER.




Aiman patiently waiting for me at the Dental Clinic. HAHA.



I was going to upload a few more until I realised that I had cut and pasted my entire picture folder into my laptop (yes, one of the fun parts about going overseas to study, you get a new laptop!) cos you know, don't want parents snooping around my (private) pictures while Im gone haha.

So yes, that's it for today! I'm going to go gargle oral wash now, don't want my gaping wisdom tooth hole (hahaha I like how I just retardedly described that!) to get all bacteria-infested. Oh crap... maybe that's why I had a fever when I woke up this morning. @@

Im infected by the sound

I am loving Cascada's Evacuate the Dance Floor. I'd better stop listening to it lest I get sick of it in a few days (as usual =.=). I expected the video to be filled with some good dancing but it wasn't... well it was, but, it wasn't. Get what I mean?

Watch it pls.







Mmmm feel like dancing.


It's been a really stressful few days. Make that the past two weeks.
I need to de-stress... but I've a feeling it's going to take some time before it goes away. After all, change does cause stress.

And stress makes me lose my appetite.


I am just so tired.



P/s: will be leaving for London in 11 days.

Fickle Pickle!

I am confirmed.

My mom's so stressed all she talks about now are preparations for me to go study in another country.

And I've been trying to stop feeling homesick (I know, I'm feeling homesick even BEFORE I've fuggin left home) but then again, I'd rather feel homesick now and feel less homesick when I get there.

Life is gay. The reason why I wanted to go to the UK is also now the reason why I want to stay.

Fucking fickle pickle.


I was in between sleep and wakefulness the whole 6 hours last night after I'd gotten that confirmation e-mail. Then just now I was trying to take a short nap just now, but the same thing happened. I need to put my mind at ease...

I've to keep reminding myself that this is inevitable. I have to leave the nest some day at some point... and I wanted this. I really wanted this. But now that I have it, I kind of don't want it anymore.

I suppose one of the reasons I feel like this is cos it all came as a shock to me. I thought with my crap results for A lvls I wouldn't be able to go anywhere till next year or a few years down the road and hence wasn't mentally and emotionally prepared.

And then there's the people I have to leave behind... Mummy, Daddy... Leysha...


Aiman.


My current circumstances have made me glad that I had turned into a hermit during the last 3 years. I am so glad I don't have any other can't-live-without friends besides Leysha and Aiman. It would make leaving here so much harder...


Looks like I'll be spending yet another birthday alone.

How apt, I always told my mum I'd become responsible and start taking responsibility seriously when I left my teen years.

And what better way to embrace responsibility than to turn 20 in a very culturally different country with only me to fend for myself.


Well then, goodbyes dinners/lunch/suppers/yumcha sessions/shopping trips are in order.

I want to see MAY YIII, Ashley, Mag, Caryn, Ying Xian, Steph, Syafiq (cute fat boy, now cute SLIM boy), Ken and all my other favorite people whom I grew up with.



K Terry's here so BYE!

TIRED BALLS

Shit I need rest.

I miss staying home and doing nothing all day.

Went to Tesco with Mummykins the other day and bought ingredients to bake Potato Dauphinois but I think I won't have the time till Tuesday evening but by then my potatoes would have already germinated. =.=

Bah! Im so bad at organizing time. No, make that organizing in general. =/

My room is a pig sty, my office desk is better than that but pretty much the same (I keep losing receipts UURRGGHHH but there's sweet, helpful Kelly who always finds them for me <3) and Terry keeps telling me I need to start organizing but HOWWW? :(


And there's this fucking annoying fella on facebook who keeps suggesting I become a fan of himself =.= note that I do not even know this annoying motherfucker! Which is why I've been filtering my friends requests; if you do not know me personally and you add me on facebook resulting in my declining, no hard feelings ok.

Btw, that guy's name is Terri K.wei. First I thought he added me cos he was interested (haha k I know I am quite full of myself) but then after looking at his profile a bit I realize that he has a girlfriend whom he loves very much! (Apparently la, according to his facebook statuses, etc.)

SO WHY THE FUCK YOU ADD ME? Trying to accumulate like 1000 over friends is it? Trying to get popular? BAH SO ANNOYED.

What annoys me the most is that after adding me, he keeps sending me those suggestion thingies to 'become a fan of Terri Woon'.

I've declined 5 times. And he just keeps sending it again!

I mean, when someone declines, TAKE A HINT YOU FOOL!


Alright I know this does not really affect my daily life and I'm quite blowing things out of proportion again, but nevertheless I am SO irked.


Maybe it's because I am quite exhausted... all this working and then going to the mall and then working and then clubbing and etc etc is wearing me out.


I should go clean now if I want to get back for a few hours of sleep before the next partying session.

I am a lala mui!

I just got my hair trimmed today after 2390483592 years of thinking about doing it haha!
And now I look like a lala mui. Well, my closest people know that deep inside, I really am a lala mui so I may as well 'fess up right now!

I AM A LALA MUI AND I LOVEE IT!

Heeeee excuse the slight hyper-ness as it has just sunk in that my exams have ended and I no longer need to feel guilty when Im (re)watching Blood+ or Boys Over Flowers or playing Parking Dash or Wedding Dash or Diaper Dash or Fitness Dash!

Yes, I have ALL the Dash games. Yes, I am also a LOSER! AND LOVING IT!

Owhkay my hyper-ness has just reached another level, but please, BEAR WITH ME!


Today I spent the whole afternoon going into every bridal shop in SS2 looking for a prom dress to rent, and it was SO tiring. And the hot hot weather only made me sticky and smelly as well as tired. =.=

I didn't exactly find something that I fell in love with, just something that looked rather alright on me. So I went and borrowed a dress from a friend, I won't say who; you just wait for the pictures and then you'll know whose dress I'm wearing haha, cos she wore that during her form 5 prom.


Anyway, I'm so sleepy but I can't sleep cos I've got a personal statement to write, again =.=, since I decided to switch courses. (yes that was what the post below this one was about haha)


I shall leave you with an old act-cool picture of Leysha and I, because I think you've probably forgotten how I look like!


Also cos I like my eye makeup in this one hehe.









Lala mui, out!


PEACE ^.^v


Owh one more thing, I'm starting work tomorrow, pray that I don't embarrass myself or let Terry (yes, I'm working for TTTT) down with my dungu-ness =.=

They say bad things happen for a reason

I've been reading this blog of a friend of mine from college.

She's the same age as I, 19, but she's been keeping this blog since she was 14. She said goodbye to it mid of last year, which was her last post.


I've been reading every post she wrote since she started off the blog till the last one. Haha I know, damn stalker. But the things she wrote in each post... The blog was like a book, one which I couldn't stop reading till it was finished.

She wrote about the things she felt about the world around her, about the way people treated her, about her mother's supposed favoritism towards her brother... her obsession with Buffy the Vampire Slayer haha.

While I was reading it I felt like I could really relate to the loneliness she felt... like when her best friend wanted to move away, and she felt really sad about it but she showed no emotion because her bestfriend didn't seem to think that she'd be sad about her moving away.

And a whole load of other stuff which I felt but didn't know how to write it out in words.... I will not mention this person's name here though, although I don't think anyone who reads my blog knows her... but yeah.


x


I got all my offers through ucas already; Bath, Manchester and York.
Bristol unsuccessful-ed me haha. Ah well.

So right now... I'm in between Bath and Manchester. I don't know why but I'm just not feeling York.... if you get what I mean haha. And after speaking to Ying over msn last night, she said something to this effect: "Some times gut feelings hold quite some weightage... so just go with your instinct, you know?" Yeah something like that haha.

But then again, whether I go to UK or not depends on my results later on. =.=
And by the looks of it I think the chances of me achieving the required scores are quite slim... so after all this talk think I'll probably just end up in Melboune.

Which.... isn't a bad thing. Not a bad thing at all.

Jade would be there, I could just hope on the train and go all the way back to Glen Waverly to see my JadoWado for Aud$5.80 whenever I'm feeling down or need someone familiar.

Speaking of someone familiar, I saw a whole bunch of familiar faces while I was there, so no problem with that ha ha. =.= I wasn't really culture-shocked at all. Or maybe it's because I was only there for a few days....

And I have so much family over there. When Mummykins and Dad come to visit they can stay with my uncle and aunt and they can go fishing and golf-ing. Haha.

But some part of me wants to go somewhere and be on my own. With nobody I know, start anew... see how I'll fair on my own in the world.

Eager to spread my wings... is that how people put it?


Ah well. None of it is going to happen if I don't get studying like, right now.



Food first though. Hehe.

Damn regret?

So my A2 exams are in 21 days; and needless to say, I am fucked.

Haha what else is new right LOL.


Right so on April 14th, Aiman and I turned half a year! Yeah I know that was like almost a month ago and I'm only blogging about it now lol. I really don't know what I do with my time these days.
I don't blog, I don't really go out late at night much and I sure as hell haven't been studying so... what happens to all that time?

Owh hmm. Now that I think about it, I've been spending most of the free time on my hands sleeping (extra) and playing stupid dash games (diner dash, cooking dash, wedding dash) BAH.

And a few days ago I think God was sending me his last warning through that tag I did on facebook. You know, the one where you put your playlist on shuffle and then after reading a question you press 'next' on your player?

Yeah so after reading the question, "What is the story of your life?", I pressed next, and the song that came up with Damn Regret by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus. HAHA.

Yes... 3 more weeks. I can still make a difference.



x



Anyway, I digressed. We celebrated our 6months as a couple in Chili's, our fav place to eat!

We know that 6 months together isn't that great... but we just like to find reasons to set aside money to go have yummy food!





WET 1023 hehe.




Hello Mr. Henskem :)




Don't know why my hair was so flat that day =.=




Act cute?








Triple Play






They used to use potato skin as the base for this






Buffalo wings!




Lamb Shoulder Steak






Beef Bacon Burger




Best mashed potato ever




Yummy FAT!













It'll be 7 months in a few days.... I love you, Bubuu!



x



Dad just came in and asked me whether I've got classes tomorrow.


And it hit me. I'm done with college. I'm all done with college.


The last leg of the race is here, yet again. This is the last 100m where you sprint as hard as you can in an 800m race.


I'm just afraid that like in running... I'll end up 3rd place, at most.

Because I didn't sprint hard enough the last 100m.

My boyfriend has sexy sexy hair

Right so I couldn't think of a title and thus I wrote what was foremost on my mind.

The foremost thing on my mind should be studying and salvaging my A levels, but no.

Instead, I am thinking of my boyfriend's hair.


It may be very very sexy hair, curling all over his face and all, but I SHOULD BE THINKING OF MY FUTURE!

Was talking to May just now and I told her that I need my motivation to study.

And she replied me simply, "er your future depends on it?"


Yes. These grades determine which uni I'll get into. The start of my future.


SO WHY AREN'T I MOTIVATED?

Can someone correct that sentence for me? It sounds wrong...



x



Staying in denial for a long time and having it blow up in my face at the end is what I am most good at, besides making a total fool of myself in public areas (omg.... so many bad memories), and this is the being-in-denial part. So I shall push it to the back of my mind and blog about something fun!

But first, May's moral class is having this Charity Walk thing, which you all should attend!

This Charity Walk is for Harvest Center Underprivileged Children. Each participant donates RM10 (come on laaaaa what's RM10!) and gets a free shirt.

They are targetting 1000 participants, so HELP OUT PLS THANKS.


I'm not attending because it's a few days to my exam =.= So I have a valid excuse.

But yes, details are as follows:

Host:
Moral Studies student of Sunway University College

Type:
Sports - Sporting Event

Network:
Malaysia

Date:
Saturday, May 30, 2009

Time:
7:00am - 1:00pm

Location:
Field of Sunway University College

Street:
No.5, Jalan University, Bandar Sunway
City/Town:
Petaling Jaya, Malaysia

Phone:
0176633076
Email:
anilim@hotmail.com

I got that from facebook, check it out HERE.


Coincidentally, my mom sent me an email with this video that is somewhat related to this.... watch it.



x



Now back to my boring life. Haha.
There's this place in college where I like to sit when I'm emo or bored and where my Indian friends like to go and smoke we call it The Benches because it's this small place with a few benches almost hidden behind the tall trees and plants places there it's sort of like a little shaded area with wind constantly blowing a place to get away from the chaos of Jalan Dungun.







Jas was carrying The Sun, and when he left for class Ley started making paper hats... and a sword and a gun. HAHA.










Mastermind doing her thing






Then came Jayesh!











I... did take pictures in the hat and bearing the sword, but the pictures were obscene and so to avoid Aiman biting my head off, I shan't post it up.


Right owhkay I have delayed studying much too long.... too long indeed.


Til the next time I find the need to blog; au revoir.



Owh right,







One of the simple things in life I love the most- the sky, at twilight.