and I don't want you to go to bed mad at me, and I don't wanna go to bed mad at you

I know how much you hate that song... but right now, the words mean more than you can imagine.

It's the 3rd night I'm going to bed with tears... and soon a third morning I wake up with my eyes swollen.


But I meant what I said.


And if you never come back... then I'll know that what we had was never real in the first place.



And I wonder if you notice that every time I don't get to say this to you over the phone, I'll either text it or write it here.

Tonight, once again, I'll write it here. Because you probably put my contact on your phone black list.



Goodnight, baby. And regardless of what you're thinking or feeling right now, of what I'M thinking and feeling right now;


I love you.




... I really do.