Killing with kindness

Holy mother of a's;dl;sldlkl;aks'f';sldfl;ka;lskd.

I feel as if there are maggots eating up my brain.
My eyes hurt.
I wish I watched more CNN with my dad.

Sometimes I wish I was contented with being mediocre.
Life would be so much easier then.

If I were,
I won't be trying to outdo myself all the time.
I wouldn't expect much from anything or anyone.
I wouldn't be too disappointed when things don't turn out the way I want them to.
I'd just be.. simply, happy.

Sure, life would be quite dull and pretty much void of emotion but sometimes I think I'd prefer a little boredom over an almost constant tumult of shitty emotions which take up a lot of my energy to contain and overcome.

Sometimes I wish I were a simple minded person.
Happy go lucky, y'know?

Gay la.
I hate this shit.